Valentines Day or as I like to call it February 14

Today is Valentine's Day, a day for love, a day for romance, a day for hiding under the covers trying to keep the tears from landing in your Ben and Jerry's....or maybe not.

When I was single, I hated Valentine’s Day. It seemed like everyone around me was obnoxiously in love and there I was, with a flashing neon sign over my head, single and unloved loser who can’t get a date

Then there were office girls. The ones who would get a dozen roses delivered from their beloved and walk around with a smug look on their face. Not to be outdone, some would get a dozen roses and balloons, just in case the flowers weren’t visible from every corner of the office. I’d hear them in the break room discussing their plans for the evening and carry over bed and breakfast plans for the weekend, discussing who got flowers and who didn’t, whose bouquet was the biggest and the best. People who never spoke to each other the rest of the year would be heard walking past and saying "nice flowers" and the response of "yours too" All members of some special club. There was always one woman who would get flowers and make sure she made the flowerless ones feel inferior and unloved.

Even in elementary school we decorate an old shoe box with hearts and our names and everyone would exchange cards and put them in each other’s box. Often including conversation hearts, do you remember those chalky things with messages like be mine, love, hi and other silly sayings? I can still remember the night before filling out Valentine’s Day cards and putting those conversation hearts into every card and comparing the message with the name, heaven forbid the wrong person got the wrong message. It seems a lifetime ago and so trivial but I still see the boxes of kids valentines cards and conversation hearts for sale in the stores. This ritual must still take place in schools across the country.

Now that I’m very happily married I can honestly say, I don’t want flowers, they make me sneeze, I don’t want candy, it doesn’t fit my healthy plan, I don’t want balloons, they get tangled in the ceiling fan, as for the bed and breakfast, not really my thing. A romantic weekend away this weekend? I can have two weekends away for this price another time of the year. Now that I’m married the whole haze over Valentines Day has been lifted. Maybe the years I worked in the advertising industry has jaded me to falling for marketing campaigns. Now through clear eyes I can see that Valentines Day is a lot of hype and heartache for so many. Love is for every day of the year, love is expressed in many ways and love is something that should come from the heart, it shouldn’t be dictated by the day on the calendar.

Yes there are those who will go out and enjoy a romantic evening with their loved ones but going out for me is more about enjoying quality time together, than about the food or the gifts. I did buy Ken a box of candy in a heart shaped box but only because it was chocolate filled with Baileys Irish Cream that I bought for his birthday and he enjoyed so much. The truth is, I buy him a box of candy every month or so. He knows how to enjoy a box of candy, eating a few each week. The box of chocolate I bought for him last Valentine’s Day lasted until May. I'm not tempted by them because they are “his”

For all of my friends out there who are happy and in love, cherish your time together because time is the most precious gift.

For all of my single friends, just remember, February 14^th is just one day out of the year, don’t spend it unhappy because marketing and advertising people say you should be in love, this is the one and only February 14, 2008, enjoy It for the 24 hours of life that it is, not for what you think it should be.

Happy Valentines Day