calm

I can’t believe it’s the last day of July. I started this blog in May of 2007 by transferring over a few posts from a blog on another site, then in June I transferred a few more posts. July…nothing. Then in August something happened. I copied over a few more posts and a new habit started that has become Scale Junkie. I really consider August to be the start of it all so I’m calling August the one year anniversary of the Scale Junkie blog. No this doesn’t mean I'll be serving cake, instead I'm serving myself a kick in the pants, you can have one too if you really want one but you'll have to give it to yourself.

I’ve weighed over 300 pounds for over 10 years and at several times over 400 pounds. Life has been a series of rollercoaster rides. I won’t get into that but those of you who know me know that the past 10 years have been particularly difficult for a variety of reasons.

I’m doing really well with my 12 week plan. I’m on track, on plan and I’m exercising. I am not going to weigh or measure until the end of the 12 weeks. I’ve put a little countdown clock on the blog for a reminder to myself…I only have to do this for 71 more days. The end of the countdown actually falls on our anniversary so I’m already looking forward to a nice dinner out and our celebration but I’m not planning a big indulgence. Something seems to be missing.

 

So what is missing? The cravings and the roller coaster of emotions. I still have a mountain of bills to pay, I still have employment worries between me and Ken but I have a sense of calm that I just can’t explain. What has changed? I’ve been exercising, I've cut out most processed foods, cut out the sugar and I’ve started the deep breathing exercises.

Cammy from Tippy Toe Diet said she does the same thing but when she inhales she says “Let” and on exhale “Go” I really like that and I’m going to try that tonight, thanks Cammy. 

Is this what normal is like? Is this what everyone else feels all of the time? Is this what its like to not feel like you’re going 100 miles an hour in 100 directions at once? This sense of calm and inner peace that I've heard about and read about but thought were just marketing ploys?

Whatever it is, I really like this feeling. I’m sleeping better and I just feel better all around. One thing I know for sure, I don’t want to spend another year in the 300 club. I want to go out with such a bang that I’m banned for life and never let back in the 300’s again.